Nursery rhymes, in general, are the worst things anyone has contributed to the literary world. They almost always contain dark themes such as handicapped-animal mutilation (Three Blind Mice), infanticide (Rock-a-bye Baby) or even a possible murder-suicide (Jack and Jill). Remember, these are supposed to be read to really young children right before you turn off the lights.
But the “nursery rhyme” I have always hated the most was This Little Piggy.
This little piggy went to market,
This little piggy stayed home,
This little piggy had roast beef,
This little piggy had none,
And this little piggy went wee wee wee all the way home.
First of all, “market” does not even remotely rhyme with “beef.” Nor does “home” and “none.” Most annoyingly, it has the audacious laziness to rhyme “home” with itself. That’s something that not even world-champion word-rhymer Kanye West can do without getting side eye from fans. It is one thing to rhyme homophones, but you can’t rhyme a word with the same word. It’s not rhyming; it’s repeating.
Also, the whole “wee wee wee” and its accompanying, terrifying, tickle-torture just reeked of pedophilia.
Anyway, this little piggy <points at self> is going wee wee wee all the home to Hawaii for some shows this Summer!
Catch me at Crossroads HI (at Hawaiian Brian’s) on Thursday, August 27 at 8pm! Also appearing will be my homegirl Cathy Tanaka, Jose Dynamite (go buy his new CD) and Patrick Tyrrell.
Get your tickets by clicking here.
And I’m sorry you had to see this poster.
wee weweewew can also be a joyful noise..pedophilia is a huge stretch in my opinion
Nursery rhymes are important for language acquisition and help with speech development. They help children develop auditory skills such as discriminating between sounds and developing the ear for the music of words.
sure cause the people that made them wanted to teach people about the horrors that happened in the world but it not good for kids cause it can mess them up when they get older
I was wondering why my nephew cried to rock a bye baby. the one on the nursery rhymes. when he hears it on other tunes he doesn’t cry but when he hears it on a particular version he crys
I thought wee wee wee meant they were crying all the way home.
Um… the piggy who went to the market was sold.
Roast beef was served with that piggy.
A piglet screaming sounds like like “wee”. That piggy got away from slaughter and ran home screaming.
2-3 of the pigs died.
There’s no pedo stuff involved in this nursery rhyme.