Wife Hacks

December 22, 2013 — Leave a comment

Life Hacks are those little tips for improving your existence by utilizing common household items in a non-intended way. For example, “Use a burning stick of uncooked spaghetti to light hard to reach wicks.” Or also, “Fill an empty ketchup bottle with water and shake it to make more admittedly-shittier ketchup. Then when the newer ketchup batches becomes clearer and clearer, keep this bottle around anyway to put out small fires started by trying to light candles with burning food.”

I’m no fount of amazeballs household tips. However, as a veteran of marriage, I do have useful Continue Reading…

Merry Christmas to you all. Every year we dress as dogs and gather around a Snow Lazarus with our living dogs to summon the spirit of our beloved dead dog from the grave. It’s a family tradition! What are some of your traditions?

Hello Vancouver

December 8, 2013 — Leave a comment

To promote my shows at The ComedyMIX in Vancouver, BC, I was going to use the poster for Raquel Welch’s movie, One MIllion Years BC. (Get it? Because they both contain “BC”. Ha ha… ah, forget it.) But I scrapped that idea since I look horrible in a leather and fur bikini. Lucky you.

So instead, you get an Andy Warhol-inspired poster which has no connection to the city or club. Oh well, what is important is that you don’t have to see me in that bikini.

Catch me for the first time ever in Vancouver, for three nights of shows: Thursday, January 2 at 8:30 PM; Friday, January 3 at 8:00 PM and 10:30 PM; and Saturday, January 4 at 8:00 PM and 10:30 PM.

New Year’s Eve

December 8, 2013 — Leave a comment

Ten years ago, Tacoma began calling itself “Grit City.” That’s pretty late in the city’s history to be picking a new nickname. That’s like your grandpa all of a sudden saying, “You know, I’d like it if everybody starts calling me ‘Scooter.'” Anyway, I digress.

The point is that I’ll be doing two shows at Grit City Comedy in Tacoma this New Year’s Eve, at 8:00 PM and 10:30 PM. Tickets are only $15, which is quite amazing considering the shameless wallet raping that goes on everywhere else on this special occasion. Use the extra money you’ll be saving to buy more drinks, buy more food, or buy more of those silly-ass blinky hats people like to buy on New Year’s Eve.

CLICK HERE TO BUY TICKETS, then see you at the club, Scooter.