Paul Ogata

Comedian | Actor | Agent Provocateur
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Paul Ogata at Crossroads HI, August 2015

Nursery rhymes, in general, are the worst things anyone has contributed to the literary world. They almost always contain dark themes such as handicapped-animal mutilation (Three Blind Mice), infanticide (Rock-a-bye Baby) or even a possible murder-suicide (Jack and Jill). Remember, these are supposed to be read to really young children right before you turn off the lights.

But the “nursery rhyme” I have always hated the most was Continue Reading

Paul Ogata vs The Yakuza

Before I tell you the bizarre tale of my recent trip to Japan, let me first say that the Yakuza are probably very nice people and law-abiding citizens. Mayyyybe. But definitely handsome, brave and well-inked. And did I mention handsome? That being said, get ready for a true story that is full of WTF. Honto desu yo!

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Since the mid-1970s, McDonald’s has featured the Hamburglar as one of its McDonaldland characters. Originally, it made zero sense to have a criminal as one of the major spokespeople for a restaurant chain. This week, however, the ghost of Ray Kroc emerged from the ground and saw his shadow, declaring 40 more years of this ridiculous marketing misstep.

Did you know that the character’s real name, according to McDonald’s, is Hamilton B. Urglar? I shit you not.

Did you also know that Continue Reading

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