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With all the money that China seems to have at its disposal, it is curious that the menus there are screwed up. Badly. Consider this post an official offer to provide my services for menu translation.

Fortunately, until China hires me to rectify the situation, their menus are still a hilarious study in whatthefuckness. Enjoy!

New Beef Taste

It’s like “new car smell.” But cow-ier.

Sheep Scorpion Burning Powder

Do not order this if you prefer your mutton and poisonous insects with a mild flavor.

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Come read my thoughts on comedy regrets, ombudsman vigilantism, and a body-fluid double-exit. It’s all in the latest installment of That’s Shanghai, promoting my Great Paul of China tour across the middle kingdom this week.

Want to come see the shows? Full details of remaining dates in Nanjing, Wuxi, Suzhou and Shanghai can be found here.

Enjoy, and I hope to see you at a show.


To catch you up on things: Dan Snyder, owner of the NFL’s Washington Redskins, has been under fire by some Native American groups for keeping his team named with the purportedly racist term. Recently, Snyder created the Washington Redskins Original Americans Foundation, which will benefit Tribal communities. Stephen Colbert, in his nightly Comedy Central news-spoof program The Colbert Report, got into hot water himself for employing racist hyperbole to satirize Dan Snyder’s actions. Colbert created the “Ching Chong Ding Dong Foundation for Sensitivity to Orientals or Whatever.”

Aaaand… suddenly Continue Reading…

Comedy Explained

March 26, 2014 — 2 Comments

Comedy Explained

Any questions?