Paul Ogata
Comedian | Actor | Agent Provocateur
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Top Ten Superheroes in the History of Ever

So much time is spent among fanboys and comic book geeks over which superhero is the greatest ever. Even on a macro scale, you will find them split on whether Marvel or DC is better. So to finally put this matter to rest, I have conducted an unbiased, scientific, comprehensive look at over 200 superheroes from both publishers (as well as from some indies) and examined them over multiple criteria to arrive at some solid answers.

And now, I give you: The Top Ten Superheroes in the History of Ever!



This may seem like rather low placement for arguably the most iconic superhero on such a list, but hear me out. Other heroes use fancy weapons: Wolverine’s adamantium claws; Superman’s heat vision; The Punisher’s myriad firearms. Batman, however, eschews the use of guns. Remember that rifle he had in Dark Knight Rises? EMP generator. Basically just a gun-shaped light switch. He hates guns. Mostly. Instead, Batman chooses to use hand-to-hand combat along with his ingenuity. Hits and wits, if you prefer your explanations to rhyme. Or punches and hunches, perhaps? Anyway, maybe if he had guns and knives he’d be higher up the list. Continue Reading

Har Paw Villa: The Unhappiest Place on Earth

Everything has its antipode, its opposite, its evil twin. Superman had Bizarro. Mr. Spock had goateed Mr. Spock. And Mammon, the second prince of Hell, had Dick Cheney. For Disneyland, I believe I have found its Garth of Ivar in Singapore’s Haw Par Villa.

For those of you unfamiliar with the tragic kingdom, imagine if Disneyland dropped acid, then Continue Reading

Monkey Likes Fanta

The 2015 Kuala Lumpur International Comedy Festival drew to a close last night with an amazingly raucous all-star show. And today I finally had some time to reflect on things that got lodged in my brain, random thoughts. I empty my head out here so I can get new brain splinters elsewhere.

• Strawberry Fanta is so good, monkeys will chew a hole in the bottom of the bottle to get it. Continue Reading

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