Auld Lang What?

Auld Lang What? post image

Happy New Year’s Eve, everybody. It’s the time for drinking, making bad decisions, drinking, fireworks, drinking and attempting to sing Auld Lang Syne.

I say “attempting” because, really, who really knows the words to the only New Year’s carol. There seems to be no end to the amount of songs people will create for Christmas, yet New Year’s Eve gets only one. And none of us can be bothered to learn it. I’ll bet you think you know it; you would be wrong.

The song Auld Lang Syne is, as you can tell by its illegible title, Scottish in origin. It literally translates from the ancient Scottish as “haggis bagpipe braveheart” or something like that. The original song contains such easy to understand lyrics as, “We twa hae paidl’d i’ the burn.” You don’t even know how many times I had to type that to get autocorrect to just say screw it and let it through.

With that in mind, feel free to use these lyrics as a much easier to sing and/or remember version of this timeless classic that nobody knows.


Should all the lyrics be forgot
and nothing comes to mind,
Just use the lyrics found right here
When you’re faking Auld Lang Syne.

It’s New Year’s Eve, you’re probably drunk
and all your speech is slurred.
And no one knows the meaning of
these old ass Scottish words.

And surely you’ll wake up tomorrow
with a tattoo on your behind.
You’ll remember how you got it more
than the words to Auld Lang Syne.

For Auld Lang Syne, my dear,
No lyrics, you don’t need ’em.
We’ll take a cup of kindness yet,
but they’ll never take OUR FREEDOM!


(Followed by head-butting the nearest blue-faced warrior. And drinking.)

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