Hello. Contrary to what my website may have tried to tell you, I am not dead. At least not yet.
About a year ago, I came up with the bright idea of writing a blog post that would be published after my death. You know, to kind of do my own eulogy and obituary. But how to do this? I kept setting a scheduled publish date that was a couple of months ahead in the future. Then before the post published, I would clock back in and change the date again. And again. And again.
The last couple of months were especially crazy with travel and other projects, and well what can I say? I missed the deadline to change the publish date. So it published.
After getting a couple of emails asking if I was okay and not really dead, I realized what had happened.
Anyway, since it got out already, here is the post in its entirety:
In movies when someone has information or dirt on another character, they say, “If anything ever happens to me, this goes public.” This is just like that, except I don’t have any information about anyone else. It’s my final message to you, from the grave. Technology has allowed me to schedule a posthumous post. Or, rather, it has allowed me to continuously delay such a post until I am no longer able to delay its posting.
This whole dying thing was bound to happen sooner or later, so don’t be sad. In fact, if you believe in the multiverse theory I’m still around with you in another possible version of the universe. Be happy. Alternatively, you might be dead in that other possibility so you should be extra happy that you’re alive to read this.
Could I have been a better son? A better husband? A better friend, uncle or human? Certainly. I did try, and I realize I came really close in some of these categories. Yet woefully short in the others.
But along the way we had some great times, didn’t we?
I met the love of my life and married her. (To my darling wife: I know I haven’t been around as much as we both would have liked. But it made the times we were together that much sweeter. You have been the perfect co-pilot on this crazy journey. I will love you always.)
I rescued some dogs. In a lot a ways, perhaps, they rescued me. (To my darling dogs: grrrr, Rawr Rawr! squeak…)
So many wonderful people in so many amazing places allowed me to bring laughter into their lives as I traveled the globe doing the greatest job in the world.
While I’ve had some victories in this go around, I’ve also been beat down. But I have no regrets. Would I do things differently if I had the chance? No, you change one thing and the whole tapestry of your life unravels. And what a rich tapestry it was. I can look back and nod in approval at all the moments, both giddy and glum. Savor your conquests. Reflect on your blunders. After all, (if you’ll allow me one final Batman reference) why do we fall? So that we can learn to pick ourselves up.
And so I guess I can’t complain. Neither should you. Pick yourselves up and get in all your love and fun and smiles before the ride is over.
See you on the other side!
My apologies again for any confusion this may have caused.
Actually, this might be a good exercise for all of you, too. Write your last words. Set your record straight. This was strangely liberating!