The Great Pretender

Many of you have asked for an update on the Qantas situation. So here we go.

To catch you up on what happened:

1) I flew to Australia on Qantas and encountered a racist flight attendant.

2) I complained about it on my website/Twitter/Facebook.

3) Qantas suggested I delete my tweet about the incident “for my own privacy.” Ha ha ha ha. Good one. Then they sent a generic email saying they don’t condone what happened.

4) A reporter somehow found this story and wrote a piece about it, which spawned numerous other news outlets to run the story.

5) A woman named Judy from Qantas called me to profusely apologize, promise that they would take care of this, then offer me free frequent flyer points. Or lounge access. Or an upgrade “if one was available” for my flight home. Which is sort of like saying, “We are very sorry. Possibly. It depends.” Anyway, I told her that I wasn’t looking for freebies/handouts. I just wanted them to make better choices, and that I hoped the guy kept his job. Also, to please keep me posted about their progress and let me know if I can assist in any way.

And that brings us to my flight home from Sydney two weeks ago. Upon checking in  Continue Reading…

America, Meet Ebola

October 1, 2014 — Leave a comment
Dustin Hoffman stopped Motaba. Can he do the same for Ebola? Not if he can't recognize a fake phone number when he sees it.

Dustin Hoffman stopped Motaba. Can he do the same for Ebola? Not if he can’t recognize a fake phone number when he sees it.

Who’s in charge of Ebola in Africa, anyway? My dad? His medical advice was always, “Rub some dirt on it and walk it off.” That’s bad advice for when an 8-year-old impales himself in the foot with a sharpened pencil, and I’m pretty sure it’s still bad advice for what’s going on in Africa. Or what’s going on in America now, I guess.

Finally (in your best Dwayne Johnson voice) Ebola has come to the United States. Dallas, to be specific. All because some guy went to visit his sick family in Liberia. To all my family: I love you dearly. But if there’s a deadly outbreak of a hemorrhagic fever that liquifies you from the inside, you can rest assured that I will still visit you, but I will do it via Skype. Or maybe Reddit, because that’s where things go viral.

For crying out loud, people, DON’T Continue Reading…

Ultra Manic

September 28, 2014 — Leave a comment

Paul Ogata: UltraManic, Asia Tour 2014

History lesson: if you liked Pacific Rim and its kaiju monsters, you would have loved the old tokusatsu TV shows. The original Godzilla films begat these awesome/silly Japanese superhero TV series, which then begat the Idris Elba blockbuster of 2013. But what are now $150 million budgets of computer generated imagery started as just a bunch of guys in rubber costumes (zippers plainly visible) knocking over miniature toy buildings.

The progenitor of these TV shows was Ultraman. In fact, some of the monsters Ultraman battled Continue Reading…

Og-Tober-Fest

September 25, 2014 — Leave a comment

Ogata: October 2014 Shows

I’m back from a fun month in Australia, and ready to get back to doing shows in North America. Oh, the tales I have to tell about my time Down Under. Here’s what I suggest: come, listen, laugh, and then return to your home. It’s a simple plan, really. It’s a traveling festival of Ogata in October, which I shall henceforth dub “Og-Tober-Fest.” The details below: Continue Reading…